Dyan Garris' Blog

Dear Dyan:
I grew up in a family (including a cruel mother) that did not love me, so I coped by overeating. After college, I spent 20+ years working in Fortune 500 companies that continued the same cruel political treatment, and during my employment I gained additional weight. I have since left my old job, gone through some serious medical issues, been diagnosed with depression (not genetically – but from childhood trauma), started to paint, and see a counselor who has helped me end all birth family contacts and begin to start a new life for myself. I have lost and gained weight over the past years, and I was hoping you would be able to help me understand, heal, and release my old coping patterns with food.
Many heartfelt thanks. – Ann R.

Hello Ann:
In our society we tend to view food as “love.” Of course it’s not, but that’s the underlying belief system. If you look at that word you will notice the “lying” contained in there. It’s a lie. Overweight in spiritual terms is basically just protection. You were protecting yourself from your cruel mother and other trauma.

Now we get to patterns. Since you couldn’t “get” love from your mother by eating, in other words, the core spiritual issue remained unresolved, you just attracted a familiar pattern by working in Fortune 500 companies. We encounter opportunities to heal issues that haven’t been resolved by simply attracting situations that will give us a forum to do so. Painting is wonderful therapy because it opens up the emotional body in ways that other things cannot. It’s another opportunity to heal.

The way to release the old coping patterns is first to understand the base of the matter, which I just told you. Then to understand that releasing patterns is a process. Then to understand about love. We cannot and do not get love from the outside. We come in here with love in every fiber of our being. Then we are taught certain things that may take us away from the core of who we really are. Right now you’re just making your way back to the real you. Basically it entails “unlearning” whatever has been taught to you or that you have previously perceived about love.

There is another important thing to understand. Our birth contracts are all about love even if they don’t look that way or feel that way. It’s important to understand that we live in an illusion that was created for the purpose of learning lessons in love. I know it doesn’t feel like that. But that’s what it is.

You see, your cruel mother and you agreed to do this lesson because it is about love. That’s the truth. When we’re up in the holding chamber with our soul group before we choose to incarnate here, we make agreements. It goes something like this:

Mother: “I love you so much.”

Ann: “I need and want to learn some very important things about love. Will you teach me?”

Then you agree on the best way to do this.

Ann: “Mother, will you agree to show up as this very cruel person, so that I may have every opportunity to learn about loving myself?

Mother: “Ann, you aren’t going to like that very much. You will probably forget how very much I love you and think of me as a horrible, cruel person your whole life.”

Ann: “I know, but can we please do this lesson together? It will help me remember the love that I am.”
Agreed.

You see? It will help you to move forward if you are able to see the role your mother has played here and why. It’s all about love even if it doesn’t look like it or feel like it. I’m not saying that here on the earth plane that all of the things that you’ve endured are not valid. They are. However, it’s all about love. I hope that helps you, Dear One.

My CD “Release” is all about this. It’s eleven tracks of music vibrationally attuned to gently release what is stuck. You will find it here Music from “Release” is often heard on Music Choice’s Soundscapes cable TV channel and many other radion stations. It charted #3 on the music billboard, and includes #1 charting songs. I wept while I recorded it. It works!
Love to you, Darling.

Dyan Garris
www.voiceoftheangels.com – Live online psychic readings and free angel card readings
www.voiceoftheangelsmagazine.com – Spiritual magazine for multi-dimensional living

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Dear Dyan:

 In May I had an astrology reading done which informed me of many changes coming into my life especially my love life.  The astrologer pinpointed when the contact would occur and the circumstances surrounding it. It did happen. We came in contact via e-mail and exchanged three e-mails, upon which I sent him my pictures and another e-mail saying hello to his personal e-mail.  I haven’t heard from him since July 9^th.  

And without being too pushy how can I determine whether or not he is not interested anymore, or maybe he hasn’t received my e-mails?  I have read many astrology reports since then. They say that we are “companions of destiny.”  The astrologer told me that sometimes you have to reach out and grab your destiny and that it would be up to me.

Our initial e-mails were done through a particular website so I don’t know what happened and should I pursue this matter?  The Angel card readings told me that all is moving accordingly and that new love is coming to my life, so what seems to be the obstacle?

With love and light,

Marzena

Dearest Marzena:

You have a beautiful name for a beautiful soul. I agree with the astrologer that we do have to reach out for our destiny. One of the most frequently asked questions any psychic gets asked is “Where is my soul mate?” I just did an interview on my radio program with soul mate expert Marj Bowers, the author of “Soulmates…The Truth.” I think you might be interested in listening to the archive. It sheds new light on the whole soul mate issue. Here is the link: http://www.blogtalkradio.com/voice-of-the-angels-

I also find that when we are attached to outcome, we do block our own path. Blocking ourselves in this way is definitely an obstacle to getting what we want. This is where I think too that there are certain cautions with which one should approach any reading. “Destiny” does get affected by free will. It’s something important to keep in mind.

Energy shifts and changes with free will. Then everything that follows shifts and changes from that as well. It’s the musical dance of the universe. But everything, everything always works to the highest good. So we have to be willing to accept a situation either way it shows up. This allows for energy flow and keeps us out of that attachment that is so fond of blocking our way.

We do have many soul mates here and we have them for very good reasons. These are aspects of the same soul. If one doesn’t work out because of free will choices, then we have opportunity for the same lessons with another aspect of the same soul. If that is confusing, begin to see yourself as a multi-dimensional being with many realities throughout the universe. If that is confusing, just know that we have opportunity to meet many that we have deep and what we think of as ”soul mate” connection with. There is just not necessarily one perfect, ultimate person for us. Everything is a lesson in love, with or without “soul mate.”

With regard to your question about whether or not you should pursue this, I vote for maybe one more email, then go on about your life. If he doesn’t answer, then as they say, he’s just not that into it. Move forward then. I find that people do make time for whatever it is they decide to make priority. You deserve to be priority. Be open to the possibility of love showing up, but in a different face. In this way, you allow it to happen, probably when you aren’t even expecting it. It’s sort of like a nice cosmic gift for lessons learned.

Angel Blessings to you,

Dyan

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Hi Dyan:

I came across your site basically whilst looking for answers.

My question I guess is, if my path is clear and open, and I am at this new phase in my life, and I am being protected and kept safe, then do I trust my instinct regarding my future? Or do I be a little reckless? Or just do what makes me happy?

I am an academic and have worked for many years as a counselor, healthcare lecturer. Studying does not come easy to me and I have to work really hard, but I have always wanted a more hands-on calming career that involves massage, aromatherapy, Reiki, and beauty. But people are looking at me as if it is a step down!

Love & Wishes from Mandy
   in Scotland

Hello Dear Mandy:

Thank you for finding us here and connecting. And yes, indeed angels are with us always!  No doubt about it. Now to answer your questions: There are a couple of really big things involved here and these underlie your whole issue.  If you can clear them up, the confusion will dissipate and the path will become clear.

The first one is to ask yourself why you wouldn’t trust your instinct regarding your future.  While you’re examining this, look to the underlying pattern. Look to the times in your life when you didn’t trust your instincts and then examine what followed. And see if you can identify where the urge to be reckless may have originated from. For example, as a teenager, if someone told you that you couldn’t do something, did it make you feel as if you wanted to go out and take risks even though your instincts told you otherwise?

Also look at who taught you not to trust your instincts and why.  This is the root of the matter. We create from our root and if our root is blocked in this way, we find it challenging to create much of anything.  And consequently we end up feeling stuck, blocked, confused, and find it challenging to move forward.

The next thing I see here is that when we let other people tell us who we are we really get off our path and become misaligned. This blocks the flow of energy necessary for co-creation. We need to learn to validate ourselves.

 I understand about people looking at you as if it’s a step down. People tend to formulate a perspective of a person, and then have trouble seeing them in some other way.  We do this because as humans we have tendencies to need to label and classify things so that we can understand them from our own belief systems, perceptions, and perspectives.  As humans, this is also very limiting for all.

We need to learn to be secure in who we are and our choices and our instincts. It doesn’t really matter what anyone else thinks. It only matters what you think. You are in charge of defining yourself.

When we’re aligned with our purpose, the rest follows. Everything falls into place. We cannot NOT be who we are. We’re living in a time period where the universe is truly asking us “Who are you?” So you must begin by asking yourself whether at a fundamental and root level you are a lightworker or an academic.

Then, of course, one could take it all a step further and ask oneself if they could combine the two.  Combining different aspects of ourselves is really a big key to turning the recipe of your life into one very unique, tasty, and very satisfying dish, rather than some boring thing that may look good and may feed others satisfactorily, but does nothing whatsoever to assuage our own hunger.

Angelic Blessings to you, Mandy, as you move forward on your path!

Dyan

www.voiceoftheangels.com

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